Trying a solution for the pain

     My doctor recommended temporarily (?) holding back from taking the Lynparza for a couple days and taking a heart burn med called Omeprazole.  So, yesterday and the night before, I did not take the pills.  I took the Omeprazole pill yesterday AM and ate very little portions often during the day, staying away from any grease or acidic food or drink.  The pain was still there but slightly less.  I finally took Tylenol which really helps later in the day.  The question in my mind is, is the Lynparza "burning" a hole in my stomach?  Heartburn is a side effect of these pills among many other things.           
     
Another far reaching question I may have is, is quality of life included in a burning feeling in my stomach worth it to stay on these pills if they are in fact causing this discomfort?  All questions that go around in my head!
        I called the cancer center yesterday afternoon as requested to report in.  Dr. Paul recommended continuing taking the Omeprazole for a week so I will take the next pill this morning (once a day in the AM recommended before breakfast) and go easy on the food intake again. I am to call in a report again this afternoon and she will tell me whether or not to continue on the Lynparza yet.  My scheduled appointment with her is July 22 after the CT scan on July 12!  
         I am really praying this pain goes down.  Guess I may be losing weight again(?).
         The trouble with pain is, it wears you down physically and mentally because you cannot ignore it!
          It reminds me of the apostle Paul's request in  II Cor. 12 when he asks God to remove the "thorn in his flesh" 3 times and the Lord says, "my grace is sufficient for you....".   I am not Paul but I will have to take the pain and rely on the doctor's opinions on what it can be.  I didn't think I had reflux or heartburn because I don't have indigestion so to speak, but, hey, might as well try all the remedies that the doc wants to try:):):)
           Meanwhile, to believe what the Lord tells us with " my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" is in His big picture!  Now I am praying about this challenge!
           Meanwhile, more reports  will be forthcoming as this condition progresses or diminishes.  
           Amazing Grace, sung for Jim Candler's Memorial Service, 2013

This week with pain

     I am not sure what the upper abdominal pain is all about.  I have been having it all week, the worst part being mostly after dinner.  It is usually located in the upper left part of my abdomen.  It is so uncomfortable I have had to start taking a Tylenol to help relieve it which it does.
     My doctor is away at the moment so tomorrow I hope to be in touch with her.  
     Meanwhile, I will take each day as a gift, and deal with it the way I think I need to.  I will have to go back to eating small portions more often during the day which I have been lax in doing.        I have also been "delinquent" about the type of food I am eating which means I have eaten pork and beef sometimes, indulged in a creamy dessert a few evenings and think that may be causing the pain.  I really don't know.
      I also haven't been exercising the way I did last year.  I get up in the morning and want to go swimming if the weather is good, but then get lazy, and there I go.  I end up doing computer or housework, and just get lazy because I am tired I guess.
      Friday I had my blood test again and will look forward to finding out about the platelets, etc.  The pills I am taking (Lynparza) sometimes affect the platelets and cause them to get low.  If they are to be found lower than the average mark is, the doctor will tell me to stop the pills for awhile until the platelets get built up again.  I am thinking maybe the platelets are low and causing me to feel more tired than I was. But who knows until the results come back(?)  Yesterday, the tumor marker was not ordered according to the nurse who took my blood!
      There is always the fact that I am 77, and old age, whether mental or physical, is still here:)
       I am looking forward to "making it" to our 50th wedding anniversary, Sept.20.    That is in 3 months, and I hope to be well enough to "celebrate" which means: to be very thankful!💗

                                             Psalm 46

Pondering Life

Today I am pondering Life and prayer.   I am still alive and feel pretty well except for a few things that I do not do anymore or cannot do the way I would like.  (Not speaking here of physical weakness or some abdominal pain that comes and goes(?)       I do not sing anymore.  I haven't felt like trying at all.  Since singing is like a sport, and I was very well trained and "in shape" to do it for so long in part of my life, I know that the drive is no longer there.  I don't have the stamina or the will, sad to say.  But then at 77, maybe that is a good thing:):)       Another thing that I feel I am lacking sometimes is praying.  What do we pray for?  So many facebook "peeps" say they are praying, or the prayer icon comes up, or similar ideas about praying.  I know I do not pray the way I should or want.  I know it cannot be a trite thing when it comes out of my mouth or mind.  "I am praying for you", or, "please pray for me", or, "they need our prayers".   All of these phrases have deep connotations when it comes to actually putting it into  practice and  commitment.          But, here is what I find to really open my mind and heart to what "praying" is and should be, written by CS Lewis.  I have been searching for a way and meaning for me in prayer.  Concentration now for me is hard and challenging.  My brain is probably so "chemoed up", I dare say concentration and lack of memory influences praying, and that is a lame excuse. So, here is what good old CS Lewis says on the subject and I appreciate this:

"Prayer is either a sheer illusion or a personal contact between embryonic, incomplete persons (ourselves) and the utterly concrete Person. Prayer, in the sense of petition, asking for things, is a small part of it; confession and penitence are its threshold, adoration its sanctuary, the presence and vision and enjoyment of God its bread and wine. In it God shows Himself to us. From The World's Last Night Compiled in A Mind Awake"

The Latest doctor's visit

       Yesterday was my doctor's appointment and her observations about the immediate future.   It also was Andrew's graduation from high school that meant a lot to all of us.  
        First of all, since Dr. Paul and I had already spoken by phone last week after the CT scan about the shrinking of the pancreas and lung tumors and the development of more liver lesions, we discussed this further.  She said she would like to continue the Lynparza pills longer to find out if they would influence the liver lesions.  As our son pointed out when I told him, does that mean she will stop the pills if the liver lesions are growing even if the pancreas and lung tumors are shrinking?   Good question!
So, in 6 weeks, I will have another CT scan and in 3 weeks more blood work.
         I will hopefully find out Monday what my tumor marker and liver enzyme count is from yesterday's blood work.
         Meanwhile, yesterday we had a very nice lunch at Brauburgers and then Andrew's graduation ceremony from high school at the Vines Center at Liberty University.  We are all very proud of him and happy for his accomplishments.
         This week has been full of activities different than the "usual".   We spent 2 wonderful days at Smith Mountain Lake compliments of Ruthie.   We had an exciting "adventure" which the following video will show! 

https://youtu.be/cx6OPJsFC-o

           I know my time is coming one of these days, but I also know it is not here yet.  I feel fine, I get tired but life presently is full of God's presence and grace. 

Jeremiah 29:11 New International Version (NIV)

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.